8 Things to Tell Yourself Every Morning  ## Metadata - Author: [[The Mel Robbins Podcast]] - Full Title: 8 Things to Tell Yourself Every Morning - Category: #podcasts - URL: https://share.snipd.com/episode/7e688699-df13-416f-864a-46e39981fa2c ## Document Notes ## Highlights - **Start The Day With A Positive Declaration** - Say “Today is going to be a great day” immediately when you wake up to prime your mind for positivity. - Ask yourself why it might be great to direct your brain to look for opportunities and benefits. Transcript: Mel Robbins And the first one is you need to tell yourself, today is going to be a great day. And this is something you should say the moment you wake up. Today is gonna be a great day. And you should say that even if things have been going bad, even if you got a lot going on today, because you can still make it a great day based on your attitude, no matter what it is that's Going to happen. And I promise you, even when you're going through a challenging time, starting your day by saying, well, today is going to be a great day. I'm going to make it a great day today. I promise you that when you start your day with this first sentence, today is going to be a great day, that there will be something great that can happen. And I wanted to start with this one as the first one, because just this morning, for example, we were getting ready to tape this episode and to talk to you today. And the team was going back and forth in text because we were figuring out what kind of coffee we were going to get. And I, of course, had to text Ben and say, oh, Ben, when you pick up my coffee, could you get a ham and cheese croissant for me, too? Because I really love the ham and cheese croissants at the place that you're going. And Ben texted back, yeah, absolutely, I'll pick up that ham and cheese croissant with you, Mel, and I'm going to be to the studio in about a half an hour. And then he ended the text with, and it's going to be a great day. Just reading that, I was like, you're right, Ben. It is going to be a great day. You want to know why? Because you said it's going to be a great day, and now I'm feeling that it's going to be a great day, and we're going to make it a great day. And by the way, this isn't just like some empty platitude. This has so much research, and we're going to unpack it throughout our conversation today. For example, I'm going to start with Dr. Daniel Amen. So Dr. Amen has been a guest on the Mel Robbins podcast. He's made a big difference in my life. He is a psychiatrist. He runs the Amen Clinics. He is a world-renowned expert on the brain. In fact, he has scanned nearly 300,000 brains. And you want to know what the first thing Dr. Daniel Amen says to himself every single morning? Can you guess? What is the sentence you think Dr. Amon says to himself? You're right. He wakes up every day and says, today is going to be a great day. Now, why does Dr. Amon say that? I'll tell you why. Because Dr. Amon says you have to program your brain. And one way you can do it is by repeating simple sentences to yourself. And so that's how I want you to start your day. In fact, he even takes it a step further. Once he says today's going to be a great day, he will often add in, huh, well, why do you think today's going to be a great day for you? And the reason why he kind of prompts himself that way with that simple sentence is because you're doing something that Dr. Amon calls directing your mind. See, your mind only knows what you put into it. Your mind will seek what you tell it to seek. Directing your mind with that sentence, today is gonna be a great day. Why might today be a great day? It puts your brain in a positive state and it makes your brain start to look for reasons why it could be a great day. ([Time 0:03:00](https://share.snipd.com/snip/26e40d19-23c9-4fb2-b1f0-f636ad8301a1)) - **A Coffee Text Turned The Mood** - Mel recounts texting a teammate about coffee and a croissant and getting a reply that it's going to be a great day. - That simple exchange instantly shifted her mood and illustrates how small cues can direct your mindset. Transcript: Mel Robbins And the team was going back and forth in text because we were figuring out what kind of coffee we were going to get. And I, of course, had to text Ben and say, oh, Ben, when you pick up my coffee, could you get a ham and cheese croissant for me, too? Because I really love the ham and cheese croissants at the place that you're going. And Ben texted back, yeah, absolutely, I'll pick up that ham and cheese croissant with you, Mel, and I'm going to be to the studio in about a half an hour. And then he ended the text with, and it's going to be a great day. Just reading that, I was like, you're right, Ben. It is going to be a great day. You want to know why? Because you said it's going to be a great day, and now I'm feeling that it's going to be a great day, and we're going to make it a great day. ([Time 0:03:50](https://share.snipd.com/snip/8b162ea2-f20e-4277-b51c-8df4f5fe034f)) - **Expect Small Surprises Daily** - Tell yourself “Something cool is going to happen for me today” to create anticipation and a scavenger-hunt mindset. - That expectation makes you notice small positive surprises you would otherwise miss. Transcript: Mel Robbins And that second sentence is something cool is going to happen for me today. Now, here's what I love about this. The first sentence you just said is today's going to be a great day, which just lifted you up, right? And you're like, okay, yeah, today's going to be a great day. Let's make today a great day. I love starting the day like that. When you say this second thing, something cool is going to happen for me today. You know what I love about this? We have gone from now lifting ourselves up and really putting positivity in our brain. This second sentence, it creates anticipation. You know, when you have something cool that's in your calendar, you know something cool is going to happen. But what if you said this sentence, something cool is going to happen for me today? It's almost like you turn the day into an adventure. And you're not doing that right now, are you? Oh, no, no, no, no. You are turning your day into a nightmare because what are you doing? You're waking up and you're bracing for bad news. You're probably assuming that something bad is going to happen. No, no, no, let's do the opposite. Let's assume something cool is gonna happen to you today. And you don't even know what it has to be because this is like a surprise. The sentence, something cool is gonna happen for me today creates this mental scavenger hunt for good things in your life. Here's a really relatable example. What if you just bumped into an old friend at the grocery store who tells you about a job opening? You've been looking for a job. I mean, that's a cool thing that happened to you today. What if a college roommate that you haven't talked to in a while suddenly texts you something funny? This actually happened to me the other day. My college roommate, whose daughter is getting married, was visiting her mother. I know this is like a long-winded story. I'm gonna make it short, I swear to God. She texted me and all of her bridesmaids from 30 years ago, out of the blue, wearing this silk thing. It was like this thing that she made us wear, where we had to wear this like garter necklace that had this big silk flower on it, on our neck, like a giant tumor. And it became this hilarious joke among us for the last 30 years. Now her daughter's getting married. So she finds this thing, texts all of her old bridesmaids this thing. And then it created this hilarious string of photos where I made one out of like from a notebook and held it in place with my shoulder, texted it. That was a really cool thing that happened. I wasn't expecting that to happen, but I believe when you say something cool is going to happen to me today, when cool things happen, you actually notice them and enjoy them more because You primed your brain to look for them. ([Time 0:10:42](https://share.snipd.com/snip/fe0d162c-4404-4032-997a-01d39d56896b)) - **Surprise Reunion Text Example** - Mel shares a real text thread where a college roommate unexpectedly sent nostalgic photos and it became a delightful surprise. - That unplanned message illustrated how priming for cool things makes you notice and savor them. Transcript: Mel Robbins She texted me and all of her bridesmaids from 30 years ago, out of the blue, wearing this silk thing. It was like this thing that she made us wear, where we had to wear this like garter necklace that had this big silk flower on it, on our neck, like a giant tumor. And it became this hilarious joke among us for the last 30 years. Now her daughter's getting married. So she finds this thing, texts all of her old bridesmaids this thing. And then it created this hilarious string of photos where I made one out of like from a notebook and held it in place with my shoulder, texted it. That was a really cool thing that happened. ([Time 0:12:22](https://share.snipd.com/snip/0d7e5d22-1e12-431f-bc37-c1e41908335c)) - **Good Mood As A Trainable Skill** - Being in a good mood for no reason is a learnable skill that reshapes how you experience life. - Training your default mood flips the brain's negative bias and improves resilience and focus. Transcript: Mel Robbins If we go a little deeper into these eight sentences, you know, one of the single best skills that you need to develop in life is to have a good attitude for no reason. I want you to stop and really consider that. It is a skill in life to have a good attitude or to be in a good mood for no reason. I mean, most people are pretty good at being in a bad mood and having a bad attitude for no reason, right? And we give people with a bad attitude a pass. I mean, it's almost like, okay, well, they're in a bad attitude. They're always in a bad mood. I want you to flip that. What if you could train yourself to be in a good mood and to have a good attitude for no reason at all? That is the single best skill that you can develop because it helps you go through life. I think we've trained ourselves to have a bad attitude or to be negative for no reason at all. We kind of expect it to happen, even though we might not have evidence that it's going to happen. I want you to learn how to do the opposite. Wake up and train yourself to be in a good mood and to have a good attitude for no reason. Just assume that good things are going to happen. And I fundamentally believe that when you assume good things are going to happen and you have a good attitude, good things do happen. Because based on all this research, you are training your brain to believe and to look for good things. So you see more good things, which means you experience good things. This is a skill. Just stop and ask yourself, honestly, do I default to kind of a negative attitude? Do I easily slip into a bad mood? Like, is it super easy for me to scan the world and find tons of reasons to be in a bad mood and to have a bad attitude? Well, if you're like 99.9% of human beings, the answer is yes. That the default is to just slip into a bad attitude, to slip into negativity. And I'm here to tell you, it is a skill to train yourself and to train your brain to default to having a good attitude and to being in a good mood for no reason. You deserve to be in a good mood for no reason. I want that to be your natural setting. I am tired of defaulting to negativity. I'm tired of being in a bad or negative mood. Aren't you? And the reason why I'm saying this is because some of the most accomplished scientists and researchers in the world have come on the Mel Robbins podcast and talked extensively about How your brain has been programmed by your past. Your brain can seek negativity by default if you're not careful. And you and I gotta wake up and recognize that you can learn how to be in a good mood and have a good attitude as a skill. That could be your need default. Wouldn't that be awesome? In fact, a lot of this comes from Dr. Paul Conti, who is a renowned psychiatrist trained at Stanford and Harvard. He gave us a master class on the Mel Robbins podcast on how you talk to yourself matters. And I want to read a quote from him that really illuminates how your negative self-talk, so the negative sentences that you say to yourself on repeat, that it is programming yourself To default to a bad mood, to default to a bad attitude. Negative sentences, negative self-talk. Dr. Paul Conti says, so just an example of negative self-talk can be, what do you say to yourself in the quiet moments? What do you say to yourself if you do something wrong? What do you say to yourself if you drop something? What do you say to yourself if you approach a new social situation or a new challenge? You probably are like, I'm an idiot. I never do anything right. I'm not good enough. Why do I always screw things up? Oh God, this is going to be terrible. On repeat, you are defaulting to a negative attitude and negative sentences. We've all been trained to do this, and I'm here to tell you it is a skill to train yourself to have a good attitude and be in a good mood for just no reason at all, because this is just what you've Programmed into your mind. And that's why these eight sentences matter. That's why I believe the single best skill that you can develop is to be in a good attitude in the absence of a reason to have one, right? I mean, you can be in a bad mood in the absence of a reason to be in one. We all know people like that. We don't want to be near them. So today, we're using these eight sentences every single morning so that you can train your brain to have a good attitude and be in a good mood for no reason at all. And to have a good attitude even when challenging things are happening. Why? Because it helps you to rise to these moments in your life. That's why this matters. When you train your mind to be in a good state, it changes the way you filter the world. It changes what you see. It changes how you handle stress. And I'm not making this up. Literally, expert after expert on this podcast has told you and me that when you change the words, you feed into your mind. You change your entire life. And so that's what these eight sentences are about. ([Time 0:13:23](https://share.snipd.com/snip/d79f0b49-c078-44b7-b049-c7a71ede9662)) - **Use A Coping Anchor For Anxiety** - Repeat “No matter what happens today, I can handle it” to anchor yourself against anxiety and future-focused worry. - Use it to challenge the automatic belief that you can't cope and to summon resilience before stressful events. Transcript: Mel Robbins And if you're a worrier, oh my gosh, you're gonna love this third sentence. No matter what happens today, I can handle it. No matter what happens today, I can handle it. This sentence packs such a powerful punch. If you're a worrier, if you get anxious easily, this is an anchor. And let me tell you why. I believe that anxiety is a moment of uncertainty where you doubt your capacity to handle something. That's what anxiety is. Something is about to happen in the future, and now you start doubting your capacity to handle it. That's why this sentence, no matter what happens today, I can handle it, is such a game changer if you're a worrier or you're anxious because it goes right to the heart of the crisis in Those moments. In those moments, you are doubting yourself. You are doubting your ability to handle what is going to happen, whether it's at school or at work or at the funeral that you're about to attend or the fact that you're going to a party tonight And your ex is gonna be there. So now you start worrying about it. What is the worrying? The worrying is anchored in this belief that you can't handle seeing your ex. And you wanna know what? It's complete garbage because you're gonna tell yourself, hey, look, no matter what happens today, I can handle it. No matter what happens at that party tonight, I can handle it. No matter if this ex of mine brings in the most fabulous new person, I can handle it. I can handle it. Because you are now challenging the core belief of somebody who worries and who is anxious, the subconscious belief that you cannot handle it. And you are hitting it. It's like a hand-to combat with your own brain. You're like, oh, no, no, no, no, no, no. I am not going to believe that lie that I can't handle this stuff. I am not going to allow myself to get anxious because here's the deal. No matter what happens today, I can handle it. And if you begin the day with this sentence every single day, no matter what happens at work today, I can handle it. No matter what happens at family dinner tonight, I can handle it. No matter what happens when I open up my bank account and I see that it's really a lot lower than I thought it was, I can handle it. When you say that, you are summoning up resilience. You are telling your brain, look, I'm not worrying. I'm not going to let you take me down the anxiety train like you have for 57 years. Because no matter what happens today, I can handle it. And here's a relatable example. Let's say you wake up and you get an email from your boss that says, I need to talk to you today. No specifics. What did your brain just do? Your brain just went, that's what your brain did. Your brain was like, it just immediately jumps to the negative. No, no, no, no, no. That's the old you. That's the you that raced ahead and your brain now, because garbage in negativity breeds garbage out. Now you're thinking out into the future and oh my gosh, this is a disaster. I'm going to get fired. This is the worst. No, no, no, no, no. No matter what happens today, I can handle it. I don't know what the conversation's about. So why would I torture myself and assume it's going to be bad for no reason? Because you don't have the reason yet, do you? ([Time 0:20:34](https://share.snipd.com/snip/48039688-e695-4639-a5dc-b7093009c7b9)) - **Why Morning Anxiety Hits Harder** - Morning anxiety often comes from the cortisol awakening response combined with a learned negative default. - Intervening first thing counteracts that hormonal surge by reprogramming what your brain scans for. Transcript: Mel Robbins There's something called the cortisol awakening response. And this is when the body's stress hormone, cortisol, it rises sharply within the first 30 to 45 minutes of waking up. Again, the word, if you want to Google it, cortisol awakening response, or the CAR. This is a normal process in your body that's designed to increase alertness and create energy for the day. But here's how this can backfire. Like the cortisol awakening response is supposed to like organize the hormone cortisol to get your butt out of bed. But here's the problem. If you're somebody that's prone to worrying, if you're somebody who doubts your capability of handling for no reason, it's just kind of your natural state. That was Mel Robbins for a long time. That cortisol surge can feel like real panic. It can feel like a real threat. It can truly feel, you know, as you have an elevated heart rate or racing thoughts or this sense of dread that something actually is about to happen. And then of course, what do you do? You doubt your ability to handle it. That was me. Like I never said, no matter what happens, I can handle it. I said, I need to sleep all day because I can't handle this. I can't handle school. I can't handle the conversation. I can't handle seeing so-and I can't handle the texts that I sent last night that I now regret. I can't handle anything. And if that sounds familiar, I do have good news. Because without understanding this, you're going to feel like you don't have power. You do have power. Because when you start to understand, oh, wait a minute, first thing in the morning, I've got this cortisol awakening response. I got these racing thoughts because I've literally trained myself to have a bad attitude or to feel anxious for no reason or to train my brain to just search out into the future and find A bazillion reasons to convince myself that I'm not capable of getting through the day. But your friend Mel Robbins is here to tell you that you are capable of facing no matter what happens. And you are capable of doing simple things like grounding yourself in the morning and reminding yourself intentionally that today's going to be a great day because I'm going to make It a great day and something cool is going to happen to me. And by the way, no matter what happens, I can handle it. You are telling your brain to look for the good. You're telling your brain that get excited because something cool is going to happen. And you're telling your brain that all that stuff that I normally freak out about despite the cortisol awakening response, uh-uh, no matter what happens, I can handle it. ([Time 0:27:20](https://share.snipd.com/snip/1ba05b0b-89fe-4a83-b136-9a5190bd935f)) - **Treat Today As A New Chapter** - Say “An exciting new chapter in my life is starting today” to give yourself permission to begin anew. - Use this line to nudge action on things you’ve been postponing and to reframe routines as opportunities. Transcript: Mel Robbins Ooh, I love this one. You ready? This is a good one. Okay. An exciting new chapter in my life is starting today. I love this because it really makes your brain look for a fresh start. It's almost like when you say an exciting new chapter in my life is starting today. You are intentionally turning the page and ending the chapter, right? Yeah, why not live each day as a chapter? Who cares? We're making this stuff up so we can make it up and feel empowered. If you feel stuck in the same old routine, this is going to shake things up. Because when you say an exciting new chapter in my life is starting today, it signals to your brain that you're ready. Oh boy, we are ready for what's next. I am ready for change. I am ready for a fresh start. And you might find yourself, if you say an exciting new chapter in my life is starting today. When you tell your brain that today's the day we're going to sign up for the class I've been thinking about for months. Today's the day I'm going to update the resume. Why? Because an exciting new chapter is starting today. Today's the day I'm going to call that friend that I've been meaning to reconnect with. Today's the day that I'm going to go home from work a different way. I'm going to commute home differently. I'm going to start a new chapter in my life. Today's the day I'm going to go for that walk. I'm not going to have a drink tonight after work. Holy cow, next thing you know, you see a new chapter starting. You see yourself journaling. You have different ideas. You look at yourself differently. You find a new coffee shop where all of a sudden you're talking to somebody next to you instead of sitting there alone, feeling like a loser and thinking negative thoughts. Oh, no, no, no, no, because you are not the kind of person that just is in a bad mood and has negative thoughts for no reason. You're the kind of person who is waking up today saying today, an exciting new chapter is starting. Let me ask you a question. Why do you only think about starting a new chapter once something horrible has happened? Like, why do you have to wait for something to end? Can create a new beginning anytime you want. Wouldn't today be the perfect day to create a new beginning? I mean, your brain would love one. I want you to stop for a minute and see how actually waiting, waiting for something to slow down, waiting for this chapter to end, waiting for this relationship to be over, waiting for The semester to be over, how that delays the good stuff, you get to start a new chapter any day you decide to, so why not do it today? And here's the thing I want you to understand. Your brain looks for whatever you tell it to expect and look for. It does. This is simply what the research says, that your brain is neutral. Your brain has to be programmed by what you tell it to do. So if you expect an exciting new chapter to start today, if you expect things to be good, you're training your brain to find it. ([Time 0:34:03](https://share.snipd.com/snip/aff4d829-d5f1-4d4c-9281-f0f9c444b1e2)) - **Leverage Your Brain's Filter** - The reticular activating system (RAS) filters info toward what you deem important, so repeated beliefs shape what you notice. - Repetition of positive sentences programs the RAS to surface opportunities and relevant cues. Transcript: Mel Robbins There is something called, in your brain, there's this filtering system in your brain called the reticular activating system. I like to call it the RAS. The RAS, the reticular activating system. It's a filter. I want you to think about it. It's almost like a hairnet that sits over your head. It's a network of neurons in the brains that acts as a filter. And this sucker has a big job. The RAS has to filter all the information in the world and they have to decide what is the tiny fraction of information. The headlines, the emails, the cars passing by, the music playing in the background, the 15 pastries in front of you, you know, at the, at the, you know, cafe that you're at right now. Like there's so much insane information coming at you. You don't even realize it. If all that information got into your conscious mind, you know what would happen? Your head would explode into a million pieces right off your shoulder. You'd be dead. I swear to God, it'd be like a car engine burning up. So the RAS is protecting you from information overload. And so it only allows a tiny fraction of information to come in to reach your conscious awareness. In fact, there's only four things that it allows into your mind. You ready what it is? Your name. Have you ever been in a crowded area and you're like, wait, did somebody just call my name? And you turn around. That was your RAS saying, oh, come on in. Let's make sure you hear that. Another one, any threat to your safety. Haven't you ever noticed that you are literally a first responder? If somebody's like, oh, and you're like, oh, that's the RAS, letting all of that information in so you don't die. Another one, ooh, when you think somebody is interested in you, you pick up on those signals pretty quickly, don't you? And we just like, the rest of the bar just disappears. You could be at a party and all of a sudden you think somebody else is like interested in you. There's nobody else in that room. That's your RAS. Laser focusing on that. And here's the holy grail. You ready? This is why these eight sentences work. The RAS, this filter in your brain, allows in anything that your brain believes is important to you. I'm going to give you an example that will really illustrate what I'm talking about in terms of how powerful this is and why it is essential that you stop just allowing your brain to be A negative space and you get serious about programming it with what's important to you that's positive. This filter, the RAS, it is working in real time, 24-7. It never takes a break. And it updates in real time based on what you focus on and based on what you think is important. I want to give you an example of how this works so you really understand how powerful this is. Have you ever been interested in buying a new car? Let's say that you're interested in buying, I don't know, like a green pickup truck. What's interesting is the second that you're interested in buying a green pickup truck, and I just noticed Ben looked at our senior producer, Amy, because I have a feeling that he's Been thinking about buying. Are you thinking about buying a green? Really? Oh my, are you kidding? What? Okay. It's freaking me out too. We are brain melding, Ben. See, this is what happens, everybody. When you have positive programming in your mind, all kinds of wacky stuff starts to happen because your thoughts are energy. They are. Like there's physics around this. I must have just picked up on that, Ben. I don't know what. He's RAS, by the way. So let me tell you this. So let's say you are like Ben. You're like, I want a green pickup truck, okay? What's interesting is before you get interested in green pickup trucks, you never see them. You see all kinds of cars. You never think about green pickup trucks. You don't see green pickup trucks. And then you start thinking, maybe I'm going to get a green pickup truck because that's a unique color. And I don't think there's a lot of green pickup trucks. Green pickup trucks just got important to you. Your brain is paying attention. And the second you said, I think I'm interested in green pickup truck. Guess what your brain did? Oh, the filter changes and it's like, Ben is interested in green pickup trucks. Let's let the green pickup trucks in. Next thing you know, Ben is driving down there. He's like, does everybody have a green pickup truck? Because now he sees them everywhere. When he walks into the dealership to go test drive one, guess what? The brain is now getting programming. Oh, he's really serious about this because he's now taking steps to do this. Ben is going to see even more green pickup trucks, so much so he might now question whether or not he wants the color green. Now, he's laughing because it's true. Now, here's the really interesting thing. Those green pickup trucks were always there. You just hadn't told your brain they were important to you. So you, in the past, because you didn't tell your brain this was important to you, your brain just blocked them out because your brain only lets these four things in to the conscious mind. When you tell your brain that something is important to you, what are you doing? You're deliberately programming it. That's what you're doing. You're telling that filter in your mind, this matters to me. And one of the ways that you program your mind is that you repeat your interest in something, which is why these sentences are so important. If you start waking up every day and you say, today's gonna be a great day, your brain and your ARIA start going oh okay this is important i gotta now change the filter and look for reasons For this to be a great day if you wake up and you tell yourself something cool is going to happen to me today your brain's like oh this is important i gotta look for something cool to happen If you wake up every day and you say to yourself, no matter what happens today, I can handle it. Oh, okay. Doubling down on your capacity to handle things. ([Time 0:37:02](https://share.snipd.com/snip/14f1856c-be2f-4f7d-b6a4-b423a8a3a8a0)) - **Acknowledge Your Effort First** - Repeat “I need to give myself more credit for how hard I'm trying” daily to counteract your inner critic. - Acknowledge invisible effort to fuel persistence and protect motivation when results lag. Transcript: Mel Robbins Oh, I love this one because you deserve this. This is the kind of sentence that I would say to you as your friend. I'm telling you right now and this is why you need to say this to yourself. Here it is. I need to give myself more credit for how hard I'm trying. Let's be honest. You are trying hard. You wake up every, you have no idea how much you do every day. And you don't give yourself credit for it. Do you know how hard it is to get through the day in today's world with a good attitude for no reason? And yet you're doing it. You get up, you do your best with your morning routine. You get yourself to work or to school, you are doing your best, you're answering the emails, you're responding to the texts, you're pouring your brain power into those things, you're Trying to take care of yourself, trying to stay connected to people, you're trying to have fun, you're trying to make more money. My God, do you know how hard you're working? How hard you're trying? You need to give yourself more credit for how hard you're trying. Instead of constantly scanning the world for the one thing you didn't do. I mean, isn't it kind of amazing that you can get through your entire to-do list except for one thing. And that one thing that you didn't get to is the thing that you're going to focus on. You can do 115 things correct at work today, but you know what you're going to focus on? You're going to focus on the one thing that you said in that meeting that nobody chimed in about. That's what you're going to focus on. Why? Because you've trained yourself to have a bad attitude and to be in a bad mood for no reason. You've trained yourself to see the things you're not doing instead of giving yourself credit for all the things you are doing. It's time to stop that. If your inner critic is louder than that inner cheerleader or coach or friend, this sentence is what you need to say. See, effort counts even when the results aren't coming as fast as you would like them to. And it's important that you double down and give yourself credit for how hard you're trying. Otherwise you're going to stop. Like why would you continue to push through the hard periods of your life if you're constantly bashing yourself and pointing out the one thing you didn't do well? Like sometimes the hardest work you're doing is invisible. It's invisible to the people around you. Do not make it invisible to yourself. Your own acknowledgement matters the most. If there's one thing that I do other than developing the skill of being in a good mood and having a good attitude for really no reason, it's like my resting default. I have consciously programmed myself to think this way. One other thing that I have done is I've trained myself to stop constantly criticizing myself and to triple down on the things that I'm doing well, not out of arrogance, but because it Creates this flywheel. If you are your own cheerleader, that's what the entire book, The High Five Habit, is all about. It's all about the science of programming yourself for celebration and for positivity and for really cheering yourself on because you need that in life. Life is hard enough without you dragging yourself down. If you only feel proud of yourself when somebody else notices and you're going to spend your entire life waiting for validation from other people and it might never come, you got to give Yourself a gold star right now because you've deserved it. You're the one that's putting in the late nights. You're the one that makes the hard choices. You're the one who is plowing through the emails and the to-do list. You're the one who keeps going when no one's watching. You're the one who may have a bad week, but then you pick yourself back up and you get back to the gym and you restart the morning routine. That's worth acknowledging. I mean, I'm always here acknowledging you, but you got to pick up the slack, man. You got to help me out with this. You got to recognize your own effort and fill your own tank up so you can keep going. It's easy to see the big wins, but oh, wow. You want to start truly winning? You got to start clapping for the little things every single day. You got out of bed? Good job. Excellent. Nice. I love that. You answered some emails today. You're winning. I see you. You did that. You spoke up at work today, even though you were a little. Oh, yes. All right. You can handle it. I love that. You did school drop-off. You held it together through back-to meetings. You checked in on your mom and dad who are aging. You still managed to shove some food in your mouth and have dinner and be present with your family. Holy cow. As far as I'm concerned, you're winning at life, period. And here's one of the other reasons why this sentence matters. I got to give myself more credit for how hard I'm trying. I want you to stop looking outside yourself for validation because when you do that, you give other people power over you. Like if other people aren't acknowledging what you're doing, let them. We got to focus on the let me part. Let me give myself credit for everything I do do. I'm good. I'm working hard. I know my intentions are good. I know I'm a good person. So repeat after me. I need to give myself more credit for how hard I'm trying. You start repeating that every single morning and guess what? You're going to feel like you're giving yourself credit for how hard you're trying. ([Time 0:48:37](https://share.snipd.com/snip/09b20367-0652-4611-acd7-60798a32e567)) - **Say It Out Loud And Repeat** - Say your sentences aloud or write them down to engage more brain systems and strengthen the programming. - Commit to 30–60 days of repetition to change habitual filters and default mood. Transcript: Mel Robbins I bet you're sitting there going, okay, Mel, a couple of questions, couple of questions for you, Mel. Do I have to say them out loud? Do I have to truly wake up and be like, today's going to be a great day? Yes. Yes. Because it engages more of your brain. And if you're a little shy or you're next to somebody or you feel a little embarrassed, I got you. It's okay. Let's just start by thinking them. Here's another way you can boost it. Write it down. Writing it down is even more effective. Why? Because when you grab that pen and you start to write these down, today's going to be a great day. Something cool is going to happen for me today. No matter what happens, I'm capable of handling it. Today's the beginning of an exciting new chapter. I deserve more credit for how hard I'm trying. When you write that down, you grab the pen, it engages your senses. And the more senses you involve, guess what? Your brain's like, oh shoot, she's really serious about this right now because she got the pen. I'm feeling her write this thing. I'm like, she's sitting down. She's putting pen to paper. She means business. I better pay attention. This is important. Let's add this to the list. It's not just the green pickup truck that we got to let in. We got to let in credit for how hard you're working. You may also be wondering, Mel, how long do I have to do this? Hmm? Like how long before I'm going to like actually feel different? Well, I researched that too. Here's what I want you to do. I want you to do this for 30 to 60 days. Did you notice he just went 30 to 60 days? That's too long. You know what that is? That kind of reaction, that is a example of the fact that you've programmed your mind to have a bad attitude for no reason. You got 30 to 60 days, you're going to live 30 to 60 days regardless of what you do. So how about we develop the skill together of being in a good mood and having a good attitude for no reason? And we're going to do that by programming your brain. See, when you rewire your brain, rewiring takes repetition. You know how many times you got to think about a green truck before you see them everywhere? Probably 30 to 60 times. And then all of a sudden they're everywhere. You're kind of thinking about it and noticing, then boom, it's like it's everywhere. How long did it take you to learn how to worry as your default? Your whole life. How long did it take you to learn to be anxious? Your whole life. How long did it take you to learn how to doubt yourself at every turn? Oh, you've been doing that your whole life. So if you've been programming negativity and self-doubt for years and years and years, I think you should give me a lousy 30 to 60 days, don't you? I think a positive reprogramming is worth a little experiment for 30 to 60 days. How about you stop doubting your capacity to have the programming take hold and doubting your capacity to do this for 30, 60 days, and you start saying, no matter what happens, I'm capable Of handling this for 30 to 60 days. Ever think about that? I mean, you do have to override the programming. So if you keep saying it out loud in the morning until you don't have to remember to say it out loud, guess what? ([Time 0:53:50](https://share.snipd.com/snip/9beab20a-c1d3-4fb8-8f0b-eae5839e84ef)) - **Give Yourself Permission To Be Growing** - Use “I'm allowed to be a work in progress” to remove the pressure for perfection and take imperfect action. - Pair that permission with daily reps so progress compounds and discouragement fades. Transcript: Mel Robbins This is the sixth one. I'm allowed to be a work in progress. I love this. I love this because you probably struggle with trying to make things perfect or looking for the perfect time or putting things off because you don't think you're ready. That is an attitude that got programmed in a long time ago based on negativity and fear. When you start to repeat, I'm allowed to be a work in progress, what you're basically saying is, you're saying, hey brain, we're gonna grow here. We're gonna make mistakes. We're a work in progress. So let's do this thing. You're giving yourself permission to not have it all together. You know, if you feel like you don't have your act together in any area of your life, just say, I'm not going to worry about that right now. First of all, because no matter what happens, I'm capable of handling it. But second, I'm allowed to be a work in progress. I don't have to have all the answers. I don't have to have it all figured out. My desk can be messy. My kids can be fighting. That big meeting later, you know, I don't have to have all the answers. I'm allowed to be a work in progress. You know, this podcast, it's always a work in progress. The Let Them Theory book, it was a work in progress that lasted two years. It still is. Do you know, just this morning, I was on email before we were taping and I was answering an email. Do you know how many mistakes are in the Let Them Theory book that got published? Oh my gosh, you guys keep catching them. It's a work in progress. In fact, a lot of the additions, it's coming out in 63 languages, which just blows my mind, has the wrong URL for the free downloads in the back. Why? It's a work in progress. Oops, We set the wrong version of the manager. Oops. We're sorting it out because it's a work in progress. Why not focus on the fact that 6 million copies of that book have been bought and read by people around the world? Why not focus on the fact that the let them theory and saying let them and let me is helping your relationships. It's helping you feel peace and power. You know, when you say I'm a work in progress, no matter what happens, we'll figure it out. Now you ride the wave and a single email doesn't take you down or put you in one of those stress tunnels. Why? Because you have developed a skill of being in a good mood and having a good attitude, not only for no reason, but in despite of what may happen. Because you know that you can figure it out. You know that you're a work in progress. You know that this is an exciting new chapter of your life. And so let me hit you with the next sentence, because this one's a really good one, because it creates momentum and it creates this sense that something awesome is coming. You ready for this sentence? If I keep showing up, life will reward me. Let's say that one again. If I just keep showing up, life will reward me. It is so easy in life to put your head down and do what I call the reps. The reps are like those little annoying, painful things that you have to do every day at school or in your business or with your health or, you know, writing the song or writing the book, Just the little boring work doing the reps. Oh my God, it's the worst. And the results that you want are coming. It is so easy to quit. In life, it's you against you. I personally believe there's that famous Jay-Z quote, it goes something, I'm going to get it wrong and feel free to write in and tell me what the right one is. But it's something like the genius thing that we did is we didn't quit. I really do believe that you can achieve the things that you want. And look, it may not look like you thought it would look. It may not occur on the timeline that you think it's supposed to occur on. But if you wake up every morning and just say to yourself, the truth, if I just keep showing up, life will reward me. And I love this because you're telling your brain, I'm not a quitter. You know what we are? We just keep showing up. And we know that at some point life will reward me if I just keep showing up. That's the game. The game isn't achieving. The game is showing up. The game is not quitting. And so you can train your brain with this mantra. If I just keep showing up, if I just keep doing the reps, if I just keep my head down and I just keep putting in the work day by day, week by week, month by month, year by year, if I just keep showing Up, life will eventually reward me. ([Time 0:58:10](https://share.snipd.com/snip/8a9ba642-cbf3-4fd2-903e-a21e968264a8)) - **Trust The Power Of Showing Up** - Repeat “If I keep showing up, life will reward me” to program stamina and reduce quitting. - Use the mantra to reframe delays as 'not yet' rather than failure. Transcript: Mel Robbins You ready for this sentence? If I keep showing up, life will reward me. Let's say that one again. If I just keep showing up, life will reward me. It is so easy in life to put your head down and do what I call the reps. The reps are like those little annoying, painful things that you have to do every day at school or in your business or with your health or, you know, writing the song or writing the book, Just the little boring work doing the reps. Oh my God, it's the worst. And the results that you want are coming. It is so easy to quit. In life, it's you against you. I personally believe there's that famous Jay-Z quote, it goes something, I'm going to get it wrong and feel free to write in and tell me what the right one is. But it's something like the genius thing that we did is we didn't quit. I really do believe that you can achieve the things that you want. And look, it may not look like you thought it would look. It may not occur on the timeline that you think it's supposed to occur on. But if you wake up every morning and just say to yourself, the truth, if I just keep showing up, life will reward me. And I love this because you're telling your brain, I'm not a quitter. You know what we are? We just keep showing up. And we know that at some point life will reward me if I just keep showing up. That's the game. The game isn't achieving. The game is showing up. The game is not quitting. And so you can train your brain with this mantra. If I just keep showing up, if I just keep doing the reps, if I just keep my head down and I just keep putting in the work day by day, week by week, month by month, year by year, if I just keep showing Up, life will eventually reward me. It is true. Every single person that you admire, everybody that has everything that you've ever wanted, whether it is the love story that you want, or it's the health that you want, or the body that You want, or the career that you want, or the success, or the music career, whatever it may be. I promise you, if you dig into their story, you will see they didn't quit. They just kept showing up. And in those moments when you want to quit, it is so easy to have a bad attitude or be in a bad mood because it hasn't happened on your timeline and then you quit. Do not do that. Do not do that. There is a reason to keep going. And the reason is the simple truth that if you just keep showing up, life will reward you. And that is how you program your brain to have stamina. That's how you program your brain for hope. That is how you program your brain to move through obstacles. Because even if it hasn't happened, it just means it hasn't happened yet. If I just keep showing up, life will reward me. And as your friend, I'm going to tell you, it's true. Life will. It's you against you. Don't quit. That sentence is how you program your brain to not quit on you, okay? Because I don't want you to quit. ([Time 1:00:56](https://share.snipd.com/snip/8e301708-4d0d-4bd1-9b01-9e8149308389)) - **Your Everyday Presence Is A Contribution** - Affirming “I have an important contribution to make” reconnects you to unique impact and daily acts that ripple outward. - Small choices like kindness and presence become meaningful contributions when you adopt that belief. Transcript: Mel Robbins I love this. I love this. I have an important contribution to make to the world. Just let that one sit for a minute. I have an important contribution to make to the world. You do. And we're friends. You can be honest with me. You know deep down that there's something greater that's meant for you, that there's something awesome that you're meant to contribute. You might not know what it is, but you know that it's true that you do. And I want to tell you as your friend, if you've ever felt invisible, or if you've wondered if what you do matters, if you've wondered if who you are matters, here's what I love about this Phrase. I have an important contribution to make to the world. It affirms that deep belief that you have, that you hold quietly on your own, that you do have an important contribution to make to the world. Your presence, your ideas, your stories, the experiences that you've had in your life, the lessons that you have to share, the actions that you take, the way that you move through the World, being in a good mood, being kind to people, these things have a powerful ripple effect on the world around you. Saying something kind to the barista might be the only nice thing that they hear all day. Out of 8 billion people on this planet, how many people do you suppose have your exact voice, your exact story, your exact way of seeing the world, your DNA, your irises, your fingerprint? Do you know how many people? One out of eight billion. One. You. That's why you have something unique and amazing to give to the world. That's why your life matters. That's why your hopes and your dreams and your energy matter. So I want you to repeat with me, I have an important contribution to make to the world. And I'm going to share something with you. I believe that my important contribution is, yes, this podcast is a big thing, but I actually believe it's the way I move through my day-to life. I believe it's the positivity that I bring. I believe it's the warmth that I just lead with, with other people. That the contribution that I'm making person to person, energy to energy, really seeing people, being kind to people, acknowledging people, that that's the contribution. And we all have the ability to do that. And when you say this sentence to yourself every morning, you write this sucker down in your journal, I have an important contribution to make to the world. Start where you are. Start with your energy. ([Time 1:04:08](https://share.snipd.com/snip/32344d0f-2fb8-42a0-8c2d-825844413fd2)) - **Practice All Eight Sentences Consistently** - Use all eight sentences each morning to program your brain: say them, write them, repeat for 30–60 days. - Expect improved mood, resilience, focus, and a higher chance of noticing opportunities. Transcript: Mel Robbins Say them out loud, write them in your journal, repeat them for 30 to 60 days, and you are going to notice something crazy happen. You're going to notice that you have developed the ability to have a good attitude. You're going to notice that your mind is helping you. You're going to notice that you spot opportunities. You're going to make more money. You're going to be in a better mood. You're going to be more resilient. You're going to feel your worry and your anxiety start to lower because you have been intentionally programming your mind to double down on the fact that you're capable. You got a huge contribution to make that no matter what, you're going to just keep showing up and doing your thing because you know the world is going to reward you. ([Time 1:08:30](https://share.snipd.com/snip/98fff5ea-2bfd-4153-90b9-66d3ad47ca7c))